Switched to the not-so-dark side

So, before I take this blog any farther and actually try to make it pretty and update it on a regular basis — I have been advised to get off of blogger and onto wordpress. So, I made the jump. It is still a work in progress (I’m really hoping to have a cool banner graphic soon or something…) but I already like the wordpress platform better. Who knows, maybe I’ll teach myself CSS

http://morganives.wordpress.com

For all of my 5 readers – I’ve set up a new feed as well so you should switch it over

new post soon. hopefully. i promise. Also, I hope to be a contributor at http://www.notsosimplelife.com/ so check it out.  Matt Cheuvront has put a group of awesome bloggers together for a comjunctive effort.  = awesomeness. I’m privledged to even have the opportunity to write with them.

4 Steps to Becoming (m)Organized

Today, I found myself clicking through unheard podcasts in iTunes as fast as I could just to clear them out of my cache. There I was, double clicking through them as fast as I could – and when going through the same podcast hearing the theme music and “Welcome” “Welcome” “Welcome” over and over again. Now, mind you, this was completely on autopilot; as if it was the most natural thing to do. The normal thing would probably be to just listen to the latest episodes of my favorites, anything that happened to catch my attention, and just let the unheard ones sit there. Nope. Not me. The little blue dots that lay to the left of each unheard line staring at me, taunting me. Well blue iTunes dots of voices unheard, information unlearned – you have met your match.

I suppose this is the same reason I have my google reader all nice and neatly sorted into distinct categories. And I have to click “Mark All as Read” after I’m done sifting through. Yes, have to.

And why the fridge being a mess really irritated me as I tried to make roasted bell pepper and white bean spread, roasted garlic butter, and olive tapenade for a lunch party at work tomorrow. And I’m using irritated lightly

4 steps to (m)organization

1. Create lists. Lots of them. Categorized lists. Grocery lists. To Do lists. Things you want to work on in your life lists. Meal plan lists. Books you want to read. etc. etc. Then, lose lists and write them again.

2. Arrange things appropriately. Coats go next to coats, red goes next to red, dairy goes next to dairy. Yes, even the coffee mugs belong next to the coffee mugs and not next to the wine glasses.

3. When possible use labels. I mean, anything for efficiency, right?

4. Cringe when something is not arranged appropriately or is not well managed and organized. However, do not say anything because you do (somehow) understand that other people are okay not leading their lives in an orderly fashion.

5. Throw out your own rules and lead your life very chaotically and messy for a few weeks. Become passionate about whatever you are doing and not focus on organizing your life. Then, on certain particular stressed out days, implement all rules at once until your life is back in compartmentalized order and you can breath.

Why are we so concerned with some parts of organization than with others? And, at what point does organization become an obsession – as if we have crossed some proverbial organization line that takes us from the normal amount to the crazy, compulsive, eyes bulging and turning red, mad mamade mim looking crazy.

The answer is in whether you are so organized that it becomes unproductive. If it is organization that will help you be more efficient later, then, by all means take time out of your day to organize. However, knowing that something will not kill you if it is not a certain way is important too. Organization is positively correlated with productivity – but only to a certain point. In this case, the cost (time and effort) of organization may not be worth the benefits (saving time and effort later). The sum of the time and effort saved should be greater than the time and effort originally spent.

By the way, I don’t actually use labels. Only on things things that really need them… like files. I hate unlabeled binders or files.

Five Floors up could have been high enough to see the Sunset

A few things have happened in my life recently that I feel coincide with each other although I’m not quite sure how to articulate it or bring it full circle in to an understandable post.

1. A man from my building committed suicide on Friday. I heard him land. After hearing an incredibly loud bang sound outside my window, I thought that someone had been shot. I ran to look outside and it was like a scene from a movie. People were all out of their cars, still with open doors, and on their cell phones. I could see the man directly across the way from me on his phone staring down outside of his window as well. I had to open my window to look down and see what happened – a car below had the largest indent in the top I had ever seen. Glass shattered all around, and a man that was in a position that could only be described as very unnatural was on the street below my window. I saw him. Lying there. I couldn’t breath and all I could do was run into the living room and cry. I had never seen anything like that and pray never to again. And I hope that none of you ever have or will either. I was overwhelmed with an incredible respect for life and deep sadness at the enigma that is human emotion.

2. My sister came to visit. We haven’t always gotten along, but bonded two summers ago over a a series of Hannah Montana marathons on the Disney channel. Don’t ask But, it became sort of “our thing” and we started getting along. When my grandmother passed away the next year, we went to see the 3D movie together and danced around the movie theater singing all of the songs. Now, she is one of the most important people in my life and I only hope that we can continue to grow and foster our relationship as sisters and friends. The weekend was full of laughter, tears, funny pictures, animal costumes at Bay to Breakers, memories of our hilarious, loud, Italian family, and endless catching up and story sharing. She left this afternoon and I already miss her dearly.

3. I watched Last Chance Harvey. Yes, a little less important on the grand scheme of things – but a movie that dives into a lost man and his quest for a more fulfilling life seems to fit into the scheme of things in my life. Smiling and taking what you want out of life. Even if you think that someone doesn’t love you or doesn’t want you there – you at least have to try and give it your all. Yes, obviously, if it is an unhealthy situation or relationship by all means leave and never come back. But, even if, there are people in your life that love you more than you will ever know and you should always tell them such. Like Harvey did

I do not understand and can not fathom what could be so terrible as to make someone feel that they can not live it anymore. And the recent economy has seen a sharp increase in the number of suicides and the calls to suicide hotlines. Regardless of money, jobs, food, houses, friends, family – I dunno – there is always something. To me, there is absolutely nothing like an Arizona sunset. No, its not over the ocean like it is here in SF… but I challenge you to find a prettier sight than the vibrant ruby sky and purple clouds that illuminate the heavens on a warm June evening. Add the Catalina Foothills or Camelback Mountain and it’s not contest. My point is that if a person looks around, solace can be found in anything. Joy and beauty are all around. Spend every breath of life with the people that make you feel good and whom you love – that is what life is about. Not money or work – but people and relationships. Just ask Harvard. I’ve been trying to practice zen meditation and mindfulness in order to get better at remember this more frequently.

That’s all I suppose. Everyone is just trying to do the best they can with the cards they are dealt. But, the people that are affected and devastated when life is lost just prove how much it is worth living. It is all we have. My dad once told me that I say “I love you” too easily (he probably doesn’t even remember, it was just a comment in passing that he meant nothing by) but I decided after much consideration that I do not think that is possible. I love easily, and frequently, and deeply, and I try to see the good in people because I think that people are inherently good. I truly believe that. Maybe I am wrong and setting myself up for failure, disappointment, and heartache… but even if so, I’ll always have Arizona sunsets.

A Metaphysical Conundrum: Advice on not following Advice

My co-worker and I were talking the other day about the amount of crap on the internet. I have 215 different subscriptions in my Google reader… and quite a few are gen-y blogs, social media blogs, and just people whom I find interesting. 215! That’s craziness! And I can’t tell you the amount of advice out there that is wishy-washy bs.* How to advance your career in 5 simple steps. How smiling saved my life. Why you should talk back to your boss and how to do it. etc. etc. etc. Maybe it sounds overly simplified, but can’t we all just live and learn? How many people are actually thinking of a certain blog post when they approach their boss for a raise, decide to spend more time with their kids, or decide to handle a conflict maturely? Seriously. I think I want to know the answer.

I am all for the consistent determination to better oneself each and every day. In fact, at the risk of sounding trite, I kind of consider it a personal mantra. I critique myself more than anyone else ever could, but I enjoy helping people (can’t wait to read New Day Revolution) and strive to be the best version of myself. I don’t need a top 5 list of how to follow my dreams. (Most) Everyone wants to work their dream job, live in their dream house with their dream spouse – and we are all striving one day at a time to get there. Life happens one breath at a time.

Change is hard. It is inconvenient, messy, and difficult. But pick yourself up by your bootstraps and make your life what you want it to be. After all, you are the only person you have to live with your whole life – why wouldn’t you want to become who you want to be? My advice to people who are seeking change and find it inconvenient: suck it up and do it anyway, or deal with it and stay the same. Those are your only two options. Only, in the latter scenario, you’re not allowed to complain anymore about not changing Is that too blunt?

So, with this is mind, I decided to unsubscribe from multiple feeds today – some of which I have been following and even enjoying for some time. Instead of reading other people’s advice on how to get my dream job or how to make my current job better… I am going to do it. Learn by doing. A hands on approach.

Enter Eva from iOrgPsych. I stumbled upon her blog today through a guest post for the series on Inconvenient Change on Life Without Pants. Not only was her post almost verbatim what I have been thinking lately, but after checking out her site I had an epiphany. In essence, she is who I want to be in a few years. I have had an affinity for I/O psychology since a class I took in senior year of high school. In fact, I chose my two majors, my minor, and my honors thesis topic on this basis. But somewhere in the craziness of a major breakup, moving to a city where I didn’t know anyone, and being 100% self-sufficient (ie cut off from the parentals), I lost this essential piece of the equation. Additionally, I have a newfound love of social media. She combines my loves two into one awesome blog.

Then, I had a meeting at Deloitte for my current job (which, by the way I do enjoy and have learned a lot from) and it reinforced my paradigm shift. Big buildings, swanky offices, corporate structure, beautiful views, coffee machines and fruit pastries, cnn on flat screen tvs all over the office. They had created an ethereal workplace. I took a deep breath and felt like Dorothy returning home to Kansas. That is where I belong. Black pencil skirts in the corner with laptops sipping on Starbucks (although I do prefer to support local coffeehouses). Yes, yes, this is what people perceive as corporate America at its worst – which seems to positively correlate negatively (yes, that’s correct) with the economic decline. But, when certain psychological principles are added to the batter, the corporate cake can be a positive, productive, innovative, and rewarding place. I want to somehow interweave my love of I/O Psych, communication, big business, and social media. I want to help people enjoy their jobs more and get more out of the workplace. It is what I have always wanted to do – big business and corporate America, but with an altruistic, humanitarian twist. That, and I am infatuated with finding out why people behave the way that they do.

Heeding my own advice I plan to pursue this path from now on. I’m going to learn whatever I can from my work now and take all of my experiences with me, but ultimately I think that this is what I want to do. I am going to read all that I can and talk to whomever I can. Change is inconvenient – but it is a constant, necessary part of taking what you want out of life.

*I do want to say that there are plenty of sites out there that do offer valuable advice on how to positively change your life, and I think that they are beneficial as long as a person doesn’t just sit idly and read them but actually takes the advice

Just keep Swimming (aka Convoluted Thoughts)

I have about three draft posts going right now – and none of them is acceptable enough to post. I am too hard on myself. That, and my mind never ever shuts off – so each of them rambles and goes in an array of directions that one might find hard to follow. Or, at least, that I find hard to follow and that has to count for something. I need to find a way to formulate my thoughts on one subject; multiple ideas come into my head and I just want to write them all out at once. It gets jumbled and hard to sort out.

One of the posts is on small acts of kindness and their ability to affect someone on deeper levels than you think is possible (thanks to my friend Travis who inspired this by making me smile on Wednesday night). Another post is on my stubbornness and whether it is helpful or detrimental (thanks to my job for throwing me totally off kilter yesterday). And the last is on if if it is possible to say “I love you” too much (thanks to my dad who told me that I, do, in fact say it too much).

But now those are three posts that you can look forward to at a different date.

Instead, today, I am just going to say that I think having a mind that never stops can be a bit irritating. I never stop thinking. Ever. Even right now – I am thinking about 6 things all at once. It gets a little hectic in my head. Writing has always helped me to make sense out of the world and realize that a lot of my thoughts are just variations of one another and I’m really only thinking a few main points at any given point in time (or spacetime now?) But I haven’t seem to even be able to get myself to write lately because of how overwhelming it seems to write down millions of things. So, if I know that it won’t end up being millions, but I don’t want to do it for that precise reason – perhaps, in a twisted way I actually like being kind of crazed and stressed and having to think too hard about too many things. I need to focus more before I can actually write about anything useful or thought provoking. Which I hope is on the way really soon; I’m sure you do too…
*Image from zazzle

Dr. Suess is my Socrates

I like nonsense – it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living. It’s a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope… and that enables you to laugh at all of life’s realities. – Dr. Seuss

I thought I would take the time to explain the name of my blog. I picked up and moved to San Francisco a little over 6 months ago and left (almost) everyone and everything I knew behind. I have this way of throwing myself into new situations just to see if I can sink or swim. I studied in Italy for 6 months for the very same reason – getting myself out of my comfort zone.

Since moving here, I have felt like I haven’t been able to put my feet on the ground yet. Awesome place to live – check. Cool roommate – check. Steady job – check. So what is it then? I’m somehow reminded of the song Something’s Missing by John Mayer. One thing I do know is that I have started to find pieces of myself that I somehow forgot were there. Yes, that sounds silly since I am a mere 22 … but somehow I lost pieces of myself in the past few years that I am getting back. I am beginning to write again, reading more for pleasure, taking up running (I absentmindedly agreed to train for a half marathon with a friend this summer …but that is a whole different story for a whole different post). I’m also finding out that I have a love for web 2.0, SEO, and social media along and have been diving back into my passion of music.

The point is: I need to begin to look through the wrong end of a telescope. Telescopes are used to enlarge certain points of the sky to see them in more detail. But, by looking through the “wrong end of the telescope” perhaps I can begin to view my life less as segments and more as one whole progression toward the person that I want to become. Also, rather than blow things up I might be able to shrink things and start to focus on the individual details of my life. Where I want it to go, and who I want to be. Yes, that ensures that this will be another Generation Y- figuring myself out – navigating through post collegiate life blog. But, so be it

I also love this Dr. Suess quote because I whole-heartedly believe in what it says. I am a dreamer and I think that a little bit of nonsense and randomness is truly what makes the world go round. I like to throw a little silliness into life and laugh until my belly hurts. If you do not have happiness in life, what else is there? I try to go through life with a positive attitude and make the best of any situation I am given. I am a very self-aware person, and think that laughing at the little things is part of what keeps a person sane. All of life’s day to day realities can actually be quite silly …if you look at them through the wrong end of the telescope.

How to Jump in Feet First

This is for Alex.

I’ve been debating starting a blog now for well over a month, if not two. I have always loved to write, and after my recent move to SF began to dabble a bit in the medium again. In fact, I have three unfinished, saved drafts of a first post. However, I have been too scared… hesitant… reluctant… chicken, if you will. I’ve never really put any of my writing out there for other people to read, and after keeping up with certain blogs that I love to read (links to come soon but I’m reaching the end of my lunch break here at work), I am wary that I will not be able to keep up. I’m the type of person that hates to do stuff I am not good at. As of late, I have been questioning whether I am actually a good writer. But, I’m also the type of person that isn’t not good at a lot of things, so I love the challenge and drive it takes to conquer something. Although I don’t enjoy things I’m not good at, if I’m passionate about it I will not stop at something until I succeed. Plus, I presume that the more you write the better you get. Or I hope so.

Enter this blog. After reading a post today from Kiersten Mitchell, I decided to write this here and now and publish it no matter what. I don’t have a theme or a picture or any links on my blog yet… but I need to start it.

And, I need to dedicate it to my best friend Alex. He has been my support system throughout the past 6 years, even though we are just now becoming as close again as we once were. He listens to my rants and raves, dishes out the best advice around, and knows me better than I know myself. He challenges my worldview, makes me questions my beliefs, and has me on the floor laughing so hard within the first two sentences of any conversation, I figure I’m well on my way to the six pack of my dreams. I could go on, but he knows what he means to me.

Just as if it were a book, and this the page you see before the content starts, I would like to dedicate this to him. Should anything ever happen to him I don’t know what I would do.

Now, I have to actually write some meaningful content I suppose.